I Surprise Myself

[poliphilo]

Yesterday morning we were in Glastonbury.



Glastonbury is one of the two places I think of as "home".

I climbed the Tor as I always do. Dion Fortune says the air at the top is full of sparkles- and I can't think of a better way of putting it. On this occasion it made me feel very heavy and earthbound. I addressed myself to the genius locii and said, "Guidance would be nice".



I came back down and rejoined Ailz and Ruth in the town- and then I surprised myself. We went down a wynd- and there was a shop there called The Witchcraft Experience or something of the sort- and I insisted we went in- and first I bought a pendant in the shape of a viulva- which I wore for the rest of the day- and then an amber ring for Ailz and a pentacle ring for myself.



Will I wear this to church on Sunday?

But of course.

Because Jesus is not enough. He's the god of the public temple I can get to most easily- so convenience comes into it- but I have to say I've never really loved him. Tipharetic Sun Gods aren't particularly lovable. They're too bright and shiny. Did anyone ever love- as opposed to adore- Apollo?  I need other Gods in my life.

Especially I need Her.

They have a Temple of the Goddess in a yard in Glastonbury. You go up wooden steps into an upper room. You take off your shoes- as if it were a mosque- and leave them by the door. There was a woman at the back arranging flowers. The shrine is Hindu or Catholic in its over-the-topness, with incense and taped music and lots and lots of images. The central image is a terracotta statue of Herself as Crone in a cloaked hood carrying Her staff. I could look at images of Jesus all day and feel nothing in particular- except admiration for the artistry- but show me any image of Her....

I lit a couple of candles- and promised I'd rebuild our temple at home- in some form or other.

Comments

[easyalchemy.livejournal.com]

I always think about Jesus as more of a Dionysius figure - I know D and Apollo are two sides of the same coin, but I find his boundary-crossing/dissolving aspects to be more at the heart of his teachings than his sun-godishness.

I've been thinking about returning to the church, too, though I was never really whole-heartedly involved, even as a young choir member. I really was there for the music.
There's a local United Church with a strong interest in social activism and awareness, which also happens to be the closest church to my house, which all seems very convenient. I'm wondering if I'm missing something, as an adult - not something I had as a kid, because rural Ontario UC is mostly about 'lasagna and disapproval,' as my friend David says. But some kind of community spirit, that's missing from the rest of life. We'll see.

[poliphilo.livejournal.com]

If I carry on going to Church- as I well may- it's because I value belonging to a spiritual community.

But it's going to be tricky. Can I be a Christian and Not-a-Christian at the same time? I suppose the only way to find out is to try living it.

[oakmouse]

Didn't the Bible say "Thou shalt have no other gods before me?" Seems to me that doesn't mean the same thing at all as "Thou shalt have no other gods" --- more like "I want to be on an equal footing with the rest". If you can manage that, then it might well work.

[poliphilo.livejournal.com]

I think something like that is what I'm being asked to do.

A balancing act.

[daisytells.livejournal.com]

There is room in every sect, cult or world religion for "seekers", isnt there? There was a sign on the door of my very fundamentalist Christian church in Salem, Massachusetts that stated "All Welcome" - and they realy meant it, too.

[poliphilo.livejournal.com]

That's nice.

Though it sort of implies that the church has the answers- and what I will be saying to them (ever so gently and maybe not out loud)- is, "Oh no, you don't"

[daisytells.livejournal.com]

I am not a complete yes-person in any church, but I would only join a church whose first premise I accept. There is something in me that balks at too many rules.

[poliphilo.livejournal.com]

Me too. Which is why I couldn't ever become a Catholic and why the relatively lackadaisical Anglican church suits me.

[daisytells.livejournal.com]

And that is why I left the Catholic Church at the age of 13 to explore the many sects of Protestantism, then diverge to Eastern religions, to paganism, to no faith at all, and finally -- home again to christianity - but not RC.

[poliphilo.livejournal.com]

At least these days we have the choice. Go back two hundred years- or less- and you accepted the brand of religion that was on offer locally- or else!