An Admission

[poliphilo]

Of course my distaste for Christmas goes back to the break-up of my first marriage. After that my kids never ever got to spend Christmas Day with me. I pretended not to mind- but I did.

I've always dealt with emotional pain by stuffing it up my jumper.

The kids are grown up now. One's in Leicester, one's in Japan and one lives with me and Ailz. There are no grandchildren- yet. Perhaps it's time I moved on....

Comments

[zoe-1418.livejournal.com]

What will you move on to?

Sometimes we celebrate Epiphany (Jan. 6) and then...is it called Candlemas? (Feb 2?), and that helps with the winter drudgery... and it's not commercialized (yet, anyway)

Oh, and our anniversary is Feb. 14. (I never liked Valentine's Day until we decided to have our wedding on it. It made a nice party for friends to come to, too!)

[seraphimsigrist.livejournal.com]

well one could ease into it by reading
Twelfth Night! what a grand play that is isn't it?
well I see this is on yours Zoe but I daresay Tony
will get it too, maybe there will be a version of
the 12th night presented as street theatre at our
Night Cafe?

Twelfth Night

[zoe-1418.livejournal.com]

Great idea! Let's put out the call to all -- gather at the Night Cafe on Twelfth Night! First we'll have a choral + mimed performance of "The 12 Days of Christmas," followed by street drama!

[poliphilo.livejournal.com]

I love Twelfth Night.

[poliphilo.livejournal.com]

For a long time I made a point of celebrating the Solstice and ignoring Christmas Day (as if that were really possible.) No, what I'm hoping is that, having recognised the source of my glumness, I may be able to stop being such a grinchy old Scrooge.

[idahoswede.livejournal.com]

If you like, next year I can have you two (and any extras you may have hanging around) to dinner and stuff you full of all sorts of food. I deal with emotional pain by stuffing my face, at least at holidays. This one, I may be going for a record.

[poliphilo.livejournal.com]

That would be nice.

Really nice.

Gods and Goddesses willing, we accept.

[bodhibird.livejournal.com]

After that my kids never ever got to spend Christmas Day with me. I pretended not to mind- but I did.

That's a pity. I'm sorry that Alice's mother has decided she's not welcome with us on Christmas Day--because it hurts Alice.

[poliphilo.livejournal.com]

It's hard for children to be torn between two households.

I suppose I could have had them for Christmas if I'd insisted, but it seemed right that they should be with their mother and I didn't want to make things any harder than they were by making any sort of fuss.

[jackiejj.livejournal.com]

I'm sorry that this season has been painful in the past. Perhaps the joy of having Ailz home and healing and your son Joe back so close will bring you peace this year.

I went out to the store today to buy pecans and found myself being "ho-ho-ho'd" to death by the noise of the place--there was an entire bag of flour spilled in the baking aisle and people were skidding on it and carts were everywhere--mayhem!

It was bliss to come back home.

Peace to you and all your family.

skidding on flour...hohoho'd to death

[zoe-1418.livejournal.com]

And wouldn't it have been more in keeping with the true spirit if instead, people were getting brooms and helping the staff clean it up, and being extra-careful and gentle with those carts, and if the manager could have turned off the piped music and instead, someone with a lovely voice spontaneously sang something...

Re: skidding on flour...hohoho'd to death

[jackiejj.livejournal.com]

Dream on, gentle spirit...

Re: skidding on flour...hohoho'd to death

[jackiejj.livejournal.com]

Kate said to tell you about the lady in front of us in the checkout. She had beautiful hair that had been waved to look like ribbon!

Kate wanted to say something, but felt too shy. I didn't, either, but we both talked about her festive hair on the drive home.

I wish we'd told her.

Festive hair

[zoe-1418.livejournal.com]

How lovely!

As to not telling her...don't worry, perhaps she'd have ruined the moment by being irritable or something... ;-) On the other hand, maybe she could just *tell* that she was being admired, and it made her feel better.

Now THAT is overkill...

[jubal51394.livejournal.com]

A white Christmas? In the grocery store? How'd you get so "special"?

[poliphilo.livejournal.com]

Thanks.

Yes, I'm going to pull up my socks and make an effort not to be grinchy this Christmas. It makes a difference to have recognised and written about the source of the pain.

I'm not particularly fond of pecans, but I love pistachios.

[sommeilbienivre.livejournal.com]

I can't say that I completely understand, but I know what it's like to be in a divorced family and try to work out who gets to spend christmas with whom. I've spent many a christmas break crying daily.

*Sympathy*

[poliphilo.livejournal.com]

Thanks.

I don't fully understand it either, but it feels like I have this stuff from the past to deal with before I can move on.

Divorce hurts everybody involved. There's got to be a better way of handling things- but I don't know what it is....