Day By Day There's Less And Less

[poliphilo]

It's like the tide nibbling away at a drawing in the sand- a constant process of subtraction.  For instance, she used to know when to apply the brakes on her wheelchair and now she doesn't and I have to do it for her. If I didn't she'd be putting her weight on the arms of the unstopped chair as she stands- and she'd end up on her back in the mud.

Incontinence has been an issue for a while. (We'll overlook the farting- she's been doing that for years.) She denies there's a problem and it feels brutal to raise it but it's mortifying that we can't take her out without her leaving little damp spots on the soft furnishings. We issue her with pads but God knows what she does with them.  Jenny has volunteered to talk about this with the district nurse.

I've worked in hospitals and care homes so you'd think I'd be cured of squeamishness, but the damp patches make my skin crawl. Jenny and Ailz and I were discussing this just now. We all feel the same.  Perhaps it makes a difference that this is a family member who has the problem.

We want to preserve my mother's dignity but she's not collaborating with us any more.  

Comments

[pondhopper.livejournal.com]

We had a waterproof padded cushion for my mother in law to sit on...as has been suggested. The cover could be changed as necessary and the inner cushion wiped down with a bleach solution. Incontinence is one of the hardest things to face and many elderly become unaware of their own body functions.

[poliphilo.livejournal.com]

I think we'll go down that route. There was a time when the appearance of a new cushion would have required an elaborate cover story but now she's not going to be bothered.