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Pebbles

Nov. 22nd, 2004 10:24 am
poliphilo: (Default)
[personal profile] poliphilo
Ailz: Would you say you knew everything about me?

Self: Hell, no.

Ailz: Cos there's this thing I'm reading that says that couples start off asking one another questions all the time and then they think they know everything about one another and get bored with the relationship.

Self: How can I possibly know everything about you when I don't know everything about myself?

Ailz: Exactly.

What is personality? It's certainly not a package tied up with string. It's not fixed. I get this image of a rock pool, washed over twice daily by the tide. It's a tight little eco-system, but one that's open to something a whole lot bigger.

O look, those pebbles weren't there before. And that crab is new.

Hello, Mr Crab.

Date: 2004-11-22 11:02 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] archyena.livejournal.com
Perhaps personality is more like a bright copper kettle.

Date: 2004-11-22 11:34 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] poliphilo.livejournal.com
That would be nice. With lots of reflections

Date: 2004-11-22 11:37 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] archyena.livejournal.com
Raindrops on roses and whiskers on kittens;
Bright copper kettles and warm woolen mittens;
Brown paper packages tied up with strings;
These are a few of my favorite things.

Date: 2004-11-22 12:10 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] poliphilo.livejournal.com
Yes, I'd figured that out already.

I knows my Rogers and Hammerstein.

Date: 2004-11-22 12:17 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] poliphilo.livejournal.com
Another thing about personality tests is that if you're the least bit savvy you can figure out what's going on and give the questioners the answers they want.

Date: 2004-11-22 01:20 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] archyena.livejournal.com
But if someone starts Rogers and Hammerstein, you have to sing too.... sorry, I'm in a silly mood this morning.

Date: 2004-11-22 02:11 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] poliphilo.livejournal.com
And why not?

I have mixed feelings about R & H. Sometimes I think they're utter dreck and sometimes there's nothing that will fit the bill so well as a rousing chorus from Oklahoma.

Date: 2004-11-22 03:17 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] arielstarshadow.livejournal.com
What makes your analogy even more intruguing is that there is also the possibility of someone coming along and reaching into your little rock pool and moving things about, taking things out, and even putting things in.

I like that, since it's indicative of the effect those around us can have on who we are - I know some people say only we can change ourselves, but I'm not entirely sure that's the case. At least, maybe some of our changes are done subconsciously, in response to those around us - it's not something we make a conscious decision to do, but rather something that just happens (for good or ill).

Date: 2004-11-22 03:19 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] jackiejj.livejournal.com
I love this:

Ailz: Would you say you knew everything about me?

Self: Hell, no.


Delightful. Makes me laugh.

Date: 2004-11-22 04:21 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] archyena.livejournal.com
Oh God. *face palm* You know we had to learn the song and a dance routine to Oklahoma in elementary school. It's actually part of the curriculum. And they wonder why so many of their kids turnout gay....

Date: 2004-11-22 04:28 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] poliphilo.livejournal.com
Wouldn't it be just awful if we were no longer able to surprise the ones we love!

Date: 2004-11-22 04:35 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] poliphilo.livejournal.com
I'm sure other people can change us. "No man is an island" and all that. X is my friend. X betrays my trust. As a result I become a less trusting person. X has changed me- and entirely against my will.

Date: 2004-11-22 04:40 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] poliphilo.livejournal.com
Aw... cute!



Date: 2004-11-22 05:00 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] jackiejj.livejournal.com
Wouldn't it be just awful if we were no longer able to surprise the ones we love!

Even the smallest surprises--or, as in this touching interchange between you and Ailz, even the smallest reassurances--can be enough to bring a happy moment into a quiet day together.

Date: 2004-11-22 05:03 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] jackiejj.livejournal.com
And what about Gilbert and Sullivan?

I'm called Little Buttercup,
Dear Little Buttercup,
Though I could never tell why...

or

I am a monarch of the sea
A ruler of the Queen's navee

Date: 2004-11-22 05:44 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] poliphilo.livejournal.com
Oh yes,

I'm particularly fond of the Duke of Plaza-Toro.

In enterprise of martial kind
When there was any fighting
He led his regiment from behind-
He found it less exciting...

These days I guess we'd call him a chicken-hawk.

Did you see Topsy-Turvy? That was a sweet film.

Date: 2004-11-22 05:48 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] morrison-maiden.livejournal.com
I think it's definitely a good (and normal) thing to not know everything about one another. Even better if you manage to surprise eachother about things you like that the other never knew and vice versa.

I wonder too, what a personality looks like. I think it's some sort of collage of interests, like one of those diagrams of parts of the brain, and which life topic is thought about for which percentage of the time...

Date: 2004-11-22 05:55 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] poliphilo.livejournal.com
When I was a kid I did a series of collages as an expression of my personality. I had these four big sheets of card and I covered them with pictures of all the stuff I was into at the time.

Date: 2004-11-23 10:14 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] besideserato.livejournal.com
Do you know what her favorite childhood toy was?

Date: 2004-11-23 10:19 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] poliphilo.livejournal.com
No, I don't. And I don't believe she knows mine either.

Date: 2004-11-23 12:57 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] besideserato.livejournal.com
Uh oh! Sounds like it's time for you guys to have another one of The Talks! [Giggles] Do tell when you find out! In fact, you should compare and contrast a little. You don't think she mind you writing in your LJ about her, do you?

In fact, do you know what she feels about your need to chronicle yourself, in a way, on the internet where anyone can take a peek?

Date: 2004-11-23 01:02 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] poliphilo.livejournal.com
She's on my friends list. [livejournal.com profile] craftyailz

But, yes, I'll go find out about the toy and report back.

Date: 2004-11-23 02:25 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] poliphilo.livejournal.com
She remembers various dolls- including one her parents bought in Italy. You put your hand on its shoulder and it walked. She says she wasn't allowed to play with it much because it was so delicate. Eventually its eyes fell out.

Then there was a Panda she had when she was in hospital with TB and which she had to leave behind on discharge.

Date: 2004-11-27 10:01 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] besideserato.livejournal.com
Oh, I had no idea she had an LJ! That is very refreshing that the both of you should share two worlds!

Date: 2004-11-27 10:06 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] besideserato.livejournal.com
When I was little my father wrote me a children's story about how toys got magic from the love children bestowed on them. This magic allowed them to move at night. So a toy that never got played with would not be able to come out and hang out with friends when everyone was asleep because it didn't have the strength.

I was so freaked out that one of my toys would not feel loved that I gave most of them away when we went to visit the nuns at a convent nearby to give to children who would and of those that remained, I arranged schedules so all of them would be played with once a week--at least.

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