Notes To Prospective Buyers

[poliphilo]

Notes To Prospective Buyers

It is a big, old house with original features.
Two rooms are painted purple and one is green,
("Satyr green" to be precise)
The kitchen is orange.
Try to imagine it beige throughout.

In the front room there are rabbits-
The beloved pets- 
(They have eaten the wallpaper- ain’t that cute?)
Try to imagine the room without them.

In the back room there are books (several thousand)
Because books do furnish a room.
And DVDs because they furnish it as well.
Why don’t you look at the fireplace instead.
(It’s marble)

In the hallway and up the stairs
Are amateur paintings on Wiccan themes,
Featuring women with challenging eyes.
Try to imagine the space without them.

There are two people dogging your steps.
They say the kitchen is a Moben and two years old.
They say the leak has been fixed (but do you believe them?)
They both want ever so much to be liked.

Try to imagine the world without them.

Comments

[silversmoke.livejournal.com]

Between your entries and Jackie's, I've found myself wanting to teach classes on How To Behave When Buying A House. Certainly it's the buyer's money, and they should get the house they want -- but aren't people raised to be charming and polite anymore?

Even if I thought your home was atrocious (which I don't) and wouldn't buy it for two pennies (which I certainly would) and hated bunnies (which is, in fact, the exacrt opposite of true), I'd still find things to compliment about it. I was taught to be kind AND honest, instead of turning up my nose like a spoiled child when things don't strike my fancy. Just because something isn't for me doesn't mean it's rubbish.

That said, it's still a good idea for you to scoot out of there while people are looking.

[poliphilo.livejournal.com]

The viewers haven't been too bad. Mind you, since most of them have been Urdu speakers, I haven't known what they were saying to one another most of the time.

But I think the process would hurt even if everyone was faultlessly polite.