poliphilo: (Default)
poliphilo ([personal profile] poliphilo) wrote2007-10-23 03:10 pm

Angry

I was in a terrible mood all yesterday. Carl came to the door and I was brusque with him, my friend Judy wrote me about some regrettable goings-on in the Archdiocese of Westminster and I replied with an attack on Cardinal Archbishop Cormac Murphy O'Connor which was quite hair-raising in its unreconstructed bigotry. In the end I had to sit myself down and ask myself what the hell was going on.

And myself replied that a friend of mine had died young- an LJ friend as it happens- and it just wasn't bloody fair.

[identity profile] mummm.livejournal.com 2007-10-23 05:29 pm (UTC)(link)
I get in those moods too. It's a real shame about your friend!

[identity profile] poliphilo.livejournal.com 2007-10-23 05:39 pm (UTC)(link)
It's strange. I didn't know him and yet I did. These long-distance friendships are becoming increasingly the norm.

[identity profile] mummm.livejournal.com 2007-10-23 05:48 pm (UTC)(link)
You are so right!

[identity profile] baritonejeff.livejournal.com 2007-10-23 05:29 pm (UTC)(link)
Understandible, to say the least. No matter what our beliefs or faiths, there are those times when it is simply impossible to make sense of things.

I empathize with your pain.

[identity profile] poliphilo.livejournal.com 2007-10-23 05:43 pm (UTC)(link)
I was angry, but not at anyone in particular, so I just hit out at anthing or anyone who came within range.

[identity profile] athenais.livejournal.com 2007-10-23 05:38 pm (UTC)(link)
I'm sorry to hear of your loss, Tony. Life is quite astonishingly unfair. I keep wishing no one had ever taught me to think of it that way.

[identity profile] poliphilo.livejournal.com 2007-10-23 06:50 pm (UTC)(link)
Thanks. It's not really my loss. I can't pretend I knew him well. But he leaves a wife and daughter who thought the world of him.

[identity profile] athenais.livejournal.com 2007-10-23 08:48 pm (UTC)(link)
It is a loss you feel, though, if you're angry about it.

[identity profile] poliphilo.livejournal.com 2007-10-23 09:40 pm (UTC)(link)
Oh yes.....

[identity profile] huskyteer.livejournal.com 2007-10-23 06:18 pm (UTC)(link)
Oh mate - I'm terribly angry, and I've been taking it out on poor [livejournal.com profile] callmemadam and random strangers. It's just a way of coping, but I'd be the first to admit it's maybe not the best.

Thank you for caring.

[identity profile] poliphilo.livejournal.com 2007-10-23 07:02 pm (UTC)(link)
But you've got to let off steam somehow

There's something really fucked up about the world. That's what I've been feeling. I wanted to break things. And if I feel that- and I hardly knew your dad- what must it be like for you?

I've got a lot of LJ friends but very few who were as vivid to me as he was. I had a very strong sense of his personality- and what a good man he was.
mokie: Earthrise seen from the moon (love)

[personal profile] mokie 2007-10-25 02:37 am (UTC)(link)
I've been in your shoes. It's part of why October's such a miserable month in mokievania. All I can really say is that I'm sorry, and that you shouldn't play down your feelings or dismiss them because it was an online friendship--you cared, you miss him, and it means he was loved all the more while he was here.

[identity profile] poliphilo.livejournal.com 2007-10-25 09:09 am (UTC)(link)
It's strange- this brave, new world where so many of our closest friends are people we've never met. It takes some adjusting to....

[identity profile] fickleasever.livejournal.com 2007-10-25 09:09 pm (UTC)(link)
Sorry about that.
:(

[identity profile] poliphilo.livejournal.com 2007-10-26 09:12 am (UTC)(link)
At least once I'd realised what I was upset about I stopped being horrible to my family and friends.