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The second of my three children hits 40 today.

When I was approaching 40 I thought of it as the beginning of middle age- because life was a series of gates and as you went through them you got your ticket punched. You were a teenager at 13, adult at 21, middle-aged at 40, old at 60- and each age had its ethos and its dress code- but now the gates have been taken down and the ticket punchers furloughed. People used to be forever telling one another to "act your age"- and those who didn't- like poor old Von Aschenbach, conking out in his deckchair with the hair dye running down his face- were pitiable if not downright wicked. That's gone now- and only the very old- those who were well into middle-age before the system broke- still carry themselves as if there were a code to be observed.
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