An Offer I Could Too Easily Refuse

 She lives in Catalonia and- in a reversal of the usual process- was taking a holiday in Sussex. When she found out that I was once an Anglican priest (still am I think) she said the Ex-pat community was crying out for a Chaplain on the Costa del Whatever-it-is. 

"But I'm blacklisted," I said.

"I think they rather favour renegades," she said. "And you get to work maybe a day and a half each week."

I kept the colour out of my language but I think I got it across to her that "wild horses wouldn't drag me..."