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1.Ailz had me looking in her eye to see if there was an eyelash on the loose; there wasn't. We both have dry, itchy eyes. We spend too much time looking at screens.

2. We buy all sorts of funny little knicknacks and gadgets from China (Ailz loves knicknacks and gadgets) They can take months to arrive and sometimes they're rubbish but they're invariably cheap, so you never really feel cheated. It's like pulling crackers: sometimes you'll get a bottle opener that works and sometimes you'll get a clip-on plastic moustache.

(The Chinese government is one of the nastiest on earth- but the country is too big to boycott.)

3. Ailz bought some "rescued" mason jars. They have labels. The one that comes first to hand says, "HI, I'M JINNY. I'M A RESCUED MASON JAR... I was going to be thrown away but I was given a second chance. I have taken multiple super hot steamy showers and now I'm looking for a new home."

That's the way to get people to recycle; individualise everything. Mind you, I've been doing it all my life. One of the reasons I hoard is because I hate to hurt the feelings of things. I had a dish full of plastic toys out of crackers hanging around for months because, well, have a heart...
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