Success

[poliphilo]

What constitutes success?

Take my man Stephen Foster. He was America's first professional songwriter. He drank too much and his marriage suffered. His songs are still performed today. He died broke at 37.

He wrote "Jeannie with the Light Brown Hair" but his wife had already left him.

Is that success or failure?

Or is the paradigm irrelevant?

I'm thinking about myself, of course.

I've never been cut-throat ambitious. I've written all my life, but never worked particularly hard at getting published. I have publication credits here, there and over yonder, but not what you'd call a career. And do I care? No, not really.

I'm living my life on my own terms. That's what matters to me.

Comments

[idahoswede.livejournal.com]

I'd define that as success.

[besideserato.livejournal.com]

Success, to most--at least as I understand it--is derived after the passing of the person in question. Some people, in fact, will give more success points to the man in the pauper's grave than the man in the great marble tomb, simply because the man in the pauper's grave suffered more and suffering equates greatness.

I on the other hand, think you are successful because you have led a life that is solely yours and you have written and cared for people around you who matter. That means a lot. And no matter where you are buried or how this comes to pass or whether people a century from now sing your song, you will have this moment, in which you looked back, around and forward and thought, "huh. Well look at that!"

Look at that, poliphilo! You're awesome. I have only read one of your novels-to-come. But I love it. And I enjoy our discussions. If I was a good singer, I would write a song for you. Alas, I am not. But maybe a story one day, after tea?

[dakegra.livejournal.com]

I'm living my life on my own terms. That's what matters to me.

If that doesn't qualify as a success, then I don't know what does.

As for the writing, I'd love to read some...

Odd but I just had this conversation yesterday...

[punrufie.livejournal.com]

The paradigm is not irrelevant, but it's a personal and highly subjective litle beast.

Me, I have had an astoundingly successful life by my own terms; much to the amazement of others who can't quite figured out how somone with such a lackadaisical and come-what-may attitude could have such brilliant "luck". I don't work overly hard to get anywhere, to do anything, or to be anyone, but I constantly fall into situations where opportunities present themselves.

My opinion is that some people just try too hard to be perfect, to be the best, the biggest, the grandest...etc. My advice to relax is met with accusations of idealism and a lack of understanding about how the real world works on my part. I can't say who is right or wrong, or even if a right and wrong exist in this case, but I am curious to see who comes out feeling more fulfilled in the end.

[jackiejj.livejournal.com]

When Kate searched for our Shaw geneology records, I realized that the only item of real interest in all those hundreds of years of lives was that one of our relatives lived on a hill with a wife and two bears.

Success for me isn't what one does, it's who one becomes.

You are thoughtful, supportive, and engaged with ideas. And the fact that you are a wonderful writer means less to me than seeing how much you honor and care for Ailz.

[sunfell.livejournal.com]

My dad was nagging me last week about going back to school and getting an advanced degree and gunning for my boss's job. He considers me a 'failure' because I haven't advanced, and don't want to.

And he's right. At least about not wanting to get into the rat-race. He doesn't seem to understand that I am perfectly content doing what I am doing, working with the responsibilites I currently have, and am not interested in taking on a greater burden. Being 'boss' means getting a Blackberry that will reel me in at all hours, being subjected to pressure all around me, and stuff that I am not up to putting up with.

I chose not to marry because I didn't want that kind of pressure, and I chose not to have children for the same reason. I need a lot of 'me' time. I might not be making a six-figure salary (hell, I am barely above 'poverty level'), but I do well enough to make ends meet, and am slowly improving my lot. I started out ten years ago with pretty much nothing. I now have a car, some hand-me-down furniture (which I am gradually replacing with my own stuff), and a shrinking debt load. In three years, I'll be out of debt and eligible (I hope) to buy my first home. To me, that is success.

[hepo.livejournal.com]

Success has many faces and all of them content.

HePo