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May. 12th, 2009

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I edited my profile. I took out the subtitle "A Priest in Spite of Himself" and restored the one that was there before, "Searching for Polia".  I also removed the line about trying to be an Anglican priest and a Wiccan high priest all at once and replaced it with "And now I am nothing in particular. Being Nothing In Particular is also a vocation."

I've been scanning the posts I made at the start of the year. I'm reassured to see that from the very beginning I was- as it were- veering about all over the road. We went to Glastonbury and I popped into a witchy shop and bought myself a pentacle ring- to restore the balance. I'm still wearing that ring, by the way. That facet of my identity- on the side of the rebels, the loners, the women- is something I won't disown.

The people at church are such lovely people, but ...

I can't be doing with all that kow-towing before a God who is imagined as a bronze age king or pharaoah. It's demeaning. It's unthinking.

I can't be doing with the cult of Jesus. Jesus as the supposed source of some pithy ethical teachings? Yes. Jesus as a mythogical sun-god- on a par with Hercules- Yes. Jesus as supernatural best friend/superego/be-all-and-end-all? No.

And I detest most hymns.

The reason I got out of the Church 25 years ago still weigh with me. I believed I'd mellowed, that I was ready to make the necessary compromises- but I haven't and I'm not. 

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